Eating Disorders
It is probably one of the most distressing situations for any parent to discover that their child has developed an eating disorder, and that they had not noticed the signs or realised the significance of what was happening. Once the eating disorder is established, it can be a very long and painful process to help your child detach themselves from the demands that the eating disorder will continue to place on them.
The parent and family role
An eating disorder impacts on the whole family and not just the young person, and this can set the young person at odds with the whole household as the usual rules around food consumption, mealtimes, shopping, cooking and spending time together can become points of high tension that create upset, emotional distance and distress all round.
Common glitches
It is likely that, despite your best efforts, your child will do their best to try and deviate from any existing eating plans that have been put in place. In the early days of the condition, it can be really hard to stop them from continuing to lose weight and maintaining a tight control over what they eat.
The tension created in any family by an eating disorder can be tremendous and leave all family members feeling frayed, fractious, disillusioned, highly anxious and distressed.
Treatment:
The Maudsley Method approach to eating disorders promotes a family response to treatment for a range of reasons; apart from the obvious one that most families eat and most parents are interested in what their child is eating. Additional factors include one or more of the following: emotional attachment in the family; if the child feels criticised or undervalued within the family; jealousy of a sibling; over or under-involved parenting style; feeling unheard or overlooked; and feeling under pressure to do well. There may also be intergenerational family factors that influence how feelings are expressed and emotional attachment is practised within the family.
First steps
If you think your child might have developed an eating disorder, contact your GP to undertake a full physical check. Alongside family therapy, it can be helpful to obtain nutritional advice and support as well as individual psychological support for your young person.
Professional teams
I am always keen to join other professionals who may be supporting you and your child, as this aids communication, maintains momentum, demonstrates care and the commitment of others to help them recover.